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TOPIC: Viz 'top tips'

Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 22:36 #1

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Howgovernmentworksviz
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 22:40 #2

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Top Tips Express Readers Viz 07 09001
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 22:48 #3

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BUY a television set exactly like your neighbours’. Then annoy them by standing outside their window and changing their channel using your identical remote control.
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 22:52 #4

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An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 22:58 #5

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10
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 23:01 #6

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diamondgeezer wrote:
An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.

:pmsl:

I have a pile of these albums, I'll have to dig them out for another look :D
the anorak hides the fact that sean is composed of 95% vaginas
Last Edit: 26 Jan 2013 23:02 by psketti.
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 23:05 #7

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Police
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Viz 'top tips' 26 Jan 2013 23:54 #8

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diamondgeezer wrote:
10

LOL!!!
“Fascists are not human. A snake is more human.” - Hugo Chávez
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Viz 'top tips' 27 Jan 2013 07:24 #9

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SAVE a fortune on laundry bills by giving your dirty shirts to Oxfam. They will wash and iron them and you can buy them back for 50p.
INVITED by vegetarians for dinner? As you’d no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours – ask for a nice steak.
thank you St Jude for favours granted
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Viz 'top tips' 27 Jan 2013 13:09 #10

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If your eyes water when chopping onions, try cutting up mushrooms instead. The tears will disappear and your dishes will taste completely different, too.

:)
Si me puede disparar los conejos, a continuación, puedo disparar fascistas
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Viz 'top tips' 27 Jan 2013 20:53 #11

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Tesco. In addition to having new workers wear 'I'm Learning' badges, get store managers to occasionally clip them round the ear for added humiliation.
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Viz 'top tips' 27 Jan 2013 21:31 #12

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Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windscreen wipers turned to “fast wipe” whenever you leave your car parked illegally.
;)
Si me puede disparar los conejos, a continuación, puedo disparar fascistas
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Viz 'top tips' 27 Jan 2013 21:37 #13

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Stop nosey neighbours from knowing which room you're in by
stealthily crawling around the house on all fours.

Dog owners. Give passers by the impression that
your dog is well trained by ordering it to do
whatever it happens to be doing already.
Si me puede disparar los conejos, a continuación, puedo disparar fascistas
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Viz 'top tips' 01 Feb 2013 23:48 #14

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Prevent your hallway getting inundated with shitloads of unwanted takeaway leaflets etc by blocking the letterbox off from the inside with a tea towel or similar as soon as the postman has been.

(^ not from Viz btw....mine)
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Viz 'top tips' 02 Feb 2013 00:13 #15

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Every time you have a drink containing ice cubes, have a kettle of boiling water on hand in case any become lodged in your throat.
Set the controls for the heart of the earth.
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Viz 'top tips' 02 Feb 2013 00:30 #16

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Burp the words 'excuse me' to save valuable time.
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