Being a male human dad I face interesting decisions constantly. They depend on where I am and who I am and how I see the world. I encounter a lot of narrow minds and even some more open than my own. I am not a homophobe although sometimes things might make me uncomfortable and perhaps I have some deeply ingrained old fashioned views regarding gender roles etc. I know these are areas I need to work on and I also know that in Georgia there are plenty of people who will think of me as a "sissy" or whatever because I am a Vegetarian or because I don't really drink or because I am a stinking liberal. Raising my son and daughter gives me certain issues.

My son is very anti girl most of the time. He is only 5 so this is not a worry for me. He hates girl shows(that his older step sister watches) and he used to even hide his face from any girl who would talk to him regardless of their age. He is better now than he used to be. My son hates to have his finger nails cut or his hair. He screams like I am killing him so I tend to let it grow although I kind of want to shave his head as I often do to my own. So recently his hair got to the length where it is long enough to be put into a samurai kind of pigtail on top of his head. He loves it and so that is fine with me although I am not sure I am brave enough to take him out in public like it. I am going against my inner prejudice by letting him be himself and encouraging him. I really would not care if he turned out to be gay although I don`t see any reason to think that he is.

He tends to prefer Dora over Diego which is not unusual from what I hear. I just wonder how people feel about such gender issues. I worry about people bullying my kids for being who they are. I worry about bullying because I know kids don't need a reason to be mean. He starts school soon so these kinds of things get thought about.

I hope I don't sound like a bigot. I am not.

This story prompted this topic:

source
www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/13/dads-s...m_hp_ref=mostpopular

I also recall a few other awesome dad pieces recently doing the rounds.

The father who made his son`s "coming out" easier.


source
www.hlntv.com/article/2013/03/15/dad-wri...on-coming-out-closet

The photo of the dad who dressed up as little red riding hood because his child wanted to be the wolf.



Or then there is this guy

My second child was a right boy into all sorts but he also loved girlie things as a little lad and even had a pushchair that he used to push his pokemon teddy around in. He also loved Disney music to the point where I dreamt the tunes all night everynight, for nearly five years. He was also partial to paper dolls and would spend ages 'dressing' them up. There are other things too that I've forgotten at the moment but all of these things had zero effect on what he eventually grew up to be.... which is a woman mad, who's never been without a girlfriend since the age of 10, lust filled male.
I wouldn't be concerned about anything at such young ages as all these little things are just part of the process of him identifying who he is

EDIT... that last pictures ace

Oh I am not worried about him being who he is or what he wants to be. My concern is mostly how he will be treated by others. For myself I really don`t care about what others think about me but I do worry about my son and daughter and how they are treated.

i-baster wrote:
That's something that you have little or no control over unfortunately. And I agree, it is a worry and something I've worried over many many times as the years have passed. All you can do is be there for them when something occurs... which it will.

i-baster wrote:
Whilst I understand the concern about how others may react...

...cool kid.

i-baster wrote:

"those who serve in close attendance to the nobility,"

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samurai

4 boys, only 1 hates girls and girle thingies...as he has no pubes yet and his bollox have not dropped.
Boys dont like girls untill they get to that age...

He is 5 and your worrying about this :
I really would not care if he turned out to be gay although I don`t see any reason to think that he is.

Seems you do care or why post

entrangermercenary1 wrote:
I care about his happiness not his sexual preferences. I made the topic after reading the first article I posted. It is more about being a good parent. I mentioned my concerns but think I was clear that my main issue was bullies. I know it will always happen sadly but that was my worry.

i-baster wrote:
Well the young chap is 5....I had no concerns for mine at that age...but if your concerned

entrangermercenary1 wrote:
You didn't care about your son when he was 5? I am not sure we follow each other.

He means sexuality. You can't extrapolate that a 5yr old kid who doesn't like girls now, won't like 'em when he's a teenager.

No one wants their kid to be bullied I would hope - the question is what tools do you give them to deal with the bullying?

there is the tried and tested 'harden up and hit em back' style of parenting which I abhor but seems to be a popular tactic. Then there are parents like those posted in the links in the op who are equipping their kids with the ability to be proud of themselves, to be different and to feel accepted flaws and warts and all.

It is natural to worry about your child being bullied - Kids can be cruel - adults even crueler.

I am in awe of my sister and her hubby and the way in which they are raising my nephew. He is a confident, happy, intelligent, expressive and gorgeous little boy - I worry for him - particularly about how school will be for him and how it may change him. I loathe the way that I can create a list of things he could be bullied for and how my mind will automatically think of ways that he could change to mitigate it - which is utterly the wrong way round. But the sad truth is that people will always find someway to knock an others confidence. A good parent imho is one who can keep that confidence up without seeing it turn to cockiness or arrogance.

andyh wrote: I wasn't saying that. That was my gender roles thing. Misunderstanding there I think.

thoreau wrote:
Thanks for saying what I was attempting to express.